Chapter # 587 in "Why Aurora's Life Should be Made into an '80's Movie":

by Melissa

Another long day at Lemoore West Hills Community
College had been completed, and Aurora climbed aboard
the bus, ready to face the long, dreary ride home.
On her way to a seat near the rear of the bus,
Aurora's eye caught the design of a fellow passenger's
T-shirt...he, too, was obviously a fan of the popular
group known as Weezer.
As she settled into her hard, uncomfortable seat,
Aurora found herself remembering the only time she had
ever gotten close to meeting her favorite musical
ensemble.
It was in June of 2000, a balmy yet not
unseasonably warm month for the city of Fresno,
California. Aurora remembered the sojourn from her
tiny hometown of Avenal very well, as she and her good
friend Plumber enjoyed a leisurely ride up to what
they referred to as "The Big City". Aurora was
looking forward to their destination, the main reason
being the small piece of paper that she clutched in
her tiny, perspiring hand. For this was no ordinary
piece of paper, this was her ticket to the Warped
Tour, a day of over 100 bands at a local college
campus, and this was her key to Rivers.
Rivers Cuomo, the lead singer for Weezer, had
always been Aurora's favorite entertainer. She had
fantasized about romantic flights of fancy with him
since the first note of a Weezer song ever penetrated
her ears. Her favorite fantasy was the thought of her
and Rivers, running towards one another in an open
meadow. Well, Rivers was actually the only one
running. Aurora had made it quite clear some time ago
that Aurora does not run.
Upon arriving at the university, Aurora turned to
Plumber and said for the umpteenth time that day: "If
I see Rivers, I just know I'll pee in my pants."
Plumber just shrugged, muttering something about how
he and his friends weren't there to see Weezer.
Aurora ignored him, too busy trying to conceal the
fact that she was short of breath. They exited the
vehicle, and were soon making their way to the
ampitheater.
At the entrance to the festivities, Aurora was
stopped by a young, pimply Rent-A-Cop who asked her to
empty her purse to prove the absence of threatening
materials. Frustrated, Aurora glared at the kid, but
quickly obliged to his wishes. After all, Rivers was
waiting.
Much to her dismay, the security guard paused. He
asked, "Is that a chain around your wrist?" Aurora
nodded. In a flash, the chain/bracelet was in the
hands of the authorities, and a shocked Aurora was
hurried through the entrance. Determined not to let
this incident ruin her evening, she rushed to find the
perfect spot to watch Weezer perform live.
As the night wore on and the crowd grew weary,
there was still no sign of Weezer. Convinced that
they were saving the best for last, Aurora asked
Plumber to save her seat, and she hurried off to
relieve herself in the makeshift facilities on the
outskirts of the vast lawn. Finding that they were
all occupied, she dashed madly behind a large
building, hoping to find more bathrooms there.
She scanned the area, and couldn't help but notice
a handsome young man leaning against the wall enjoying
a cigarette. Forgetting her inhibitions and her duty
to nature for a moment, she gathered up her nerve and
walked over to introduce herself. What the hell, she
thought...I'll probably never see him again.
The young man, as though sensing her presence,
looked up quickly. Aurora had to fight to keep her
balance--it was Rivers Cuomo! He glanced at her, and
then quickly turned away. It was too late,
however--Aurora had found the man of her dreams.
Rivers looked up again and sighed upon learning
that his unwelcome visitor had chosen to stay around
for a while. He put out his cigarette, ran a hand
through his long, dark hair, and began to make his way
over to her.
Aurora fought to compose herself. What would she
say? How would she act? Did she look okay? She
opened her mouth to speak, but the action proved
futile after the words that Rivers uttered next:
"So, do you want to fuck now, because I always have
to lay somebody before I perform or I suck. What do
you say?"
Dumbfounded, Aurora opened her mouth to accept the
proposal, with thoughts of pleasure and ectasy she had
not yet experienced dancing through her mind. Before
the first word left her mouth, however, Rivers spoke
once more.
"You know what? I just noticed that you don't have
any chains on. I have to have a chick with chains on,
or I just can't get excited. Call me crazy, huh? See
you later--performance coming up, you know?"
And with that, he walked away.
Aurora watched him retreat, feeling hurt and
defeated. Suddenly, a warm feeling crept over her,
and she felt a tingle in her right leg. Looking down,
she saw a puddle begin to form on the sidewalk, and
she smiled in spite of herself. She really had peed
in her pants when she saw Rivers Cuomo. Soggy and
miserable, she walked slowly back to her seat,
embarrassed but anxious to catch the show. This had
certainly been a day to remember.
Suddenly the bus lurched to a stop. Aurora was
roused out of her daydream. She was at her
destination, and all was well with the world again.
While exiting the bus, she glanced once again at the
gentleman wearing the Weezer shirt. He caught her
gaze and waved, exposing the bright chain wrapped
around his wrist. Aurora felt a tear catch in her
eye, and she hurried off of the bus.
What a crazy world we live in, huh?